Not a good day.

Today was Truitt's two month well baby checkup. I wake up every morning of an appointment with a knot in my stomach. What will they tell me? Will they have good or bad news? I constantly worry about something else going wrong. I have this fear of getting news that could tear me apart.

The pediatrician said he looked great. He is now 11 lbs. and 22 3/4 inches long.She was thrilled to hear him cooing and says that is a very good sign. She did his exam and says physically he is right where he should be, no signs of cerebral palsy still. So far so good. She then measured Truitt's head and was a little concerned it is not growing in correlation with his body. The pediatrician said she is slightly concerned given his history and will continue to monitor it. To me, it just ripped my heart out.

I have gotten to a point where I am so happy with where he is at. Unfortunately, I know days like this will come. It may be nothing, but it could be something. And when you are dealing with what we have been through, everything thats not perfect is hard to handle. As I sit here, I feel numb again. I have my strength, but my times of weakness are so powerful.

I know its too soon to worry, but how could I not? I want him to be perfect. I want him to overcome everything and just be a happy, healthy little boy. All we can do is pray and ask for you to pray with us. He still needs us all and I know like everything else, we will get through this too. I continue to hope for the best, but plan for the worst. I truly feel that the future holds his destiny. Until then we must ask for god to continue to help him through this obstacle.