A New Outlook

As I sat here yesterday, reading the words of Stellan's mother, I felt guilty. Guilty for ever being mad, frustrated or overwhelmed at this life I have been living. Truitt is here, he is healthy, just with a future unknown. But he at least HAS a future. How selfish of me to ever take that for granted in the littlest way.

Across the country this very moment sits a mother holding her son, knowing he is on a fine line between life and death, yet she is still so trusting of it all. So appreciative of the little time she does have with her son, never begging God for more.

He is still hanging on, that sweet Stellan, and I hope he continues to fight hard. I know he is a survivor, he's one tough little guy. I will pray for him constantly until he is home and well. I know he can do it, he is strong just like my Truitt.

The month of July brought so much for me. A whole new outlook on my new life, and a new acceptance of Truitt's condition. I can think about, talk about, or hear about anything related to his condition and not get upset one bit. That is one huge step in the right direction for me, so huge it would take a lot for me to take a step back. Now that's what I call progress.

I am doing so well now, feeling so happy and so positive. In a way I feel like I am back to my old self, finally! I now firmly realize, Truitt has changed me for the better. I never knew life as I know it now. It's incredible. This life I was once so weary of is now a life I feel blessed to be living in. He continues to teach me about the best things in life, and I am so glad tonight I have him to hold. To love, to call my own.

He is more than I could have ever asked for in a child. Such a gift, a miracle in the making. I am so glad that tonight he is here with us and he is well. That is my wish for Stellan's family too. To have him home, healed, and doing well.