Greg and I took Truitt for a walk tonight. The weather was just perfect, it almost feels like fall. As we rounded the corner to head home, we noticed our new neighbors out walking so we introduced ourselves.
They are a young couple, and are expecting a baby boy later this month. I was so excited to hear she was having a boy. Our neighborhood is full of baby boys. We are happy to be welcoming one more! Of course, like all expectant moms, she walked in close to get a peek at Truitt. At that moment he started seizing. My heart sunk. I got so mad, why right then? It forces me to tell the whole story. That story I hate to tell. But I did. I had no choice.
I know that I would rather people just know, than for them to wonder. I just hate having to explain it, and I hate more than anything seeing their reaction. Although she was very sincere and thought he looked wonderful, it is something as a mom I never want to tell someone. That my son suffered oxygen loss.
I so wish I could avoid these things, but this is our life. I don't want to hide it, it just hurts. I just like to feel normal, and for people to think Truitt is "normal". I long for the feeling of being a normal family. I don't want to be defined by this, but I am beginning to feel like we are. We can't even meet new neighbors without having to introduce ourselves as the family with a special needs child.
I am learning that that is exactly what we are. Of that, I am learning to be proud.
As we walked the rest of the way home I felt something I haven't felt before. I was so thankful that after all we had a baby to introduce them to. For the first time I pictured meeting them without Truitt, if we would have lost him. What would I have felt then? I can't imagine that kind of pain.
I am so glad he is here, and that we get to watch him grow. These are just the stepping stones we must cross to get to where we're going. In the end it will all be worth it. I know it will. He is such a blessing to us, and to all those around him. Thank God for this child of ours.
1 comment:
NEW NEIGHBORS....how exciteing it is to meet new friends especially close by. I am sure the new Mom to be had many emotions learning about Truitt! So good you were able to tell them early on and never be ashamed how what he is going through! Your strength, honesty and wisdom will be a true inspiration to her. Every expectant Mother fears something bad will happen and most never come to be. Let pray for the new baby boy who will arrive soon. You are so right, Truitt is such a blessing to all of us.
As we grow up, we find that everyone has some type of disability in their life. Some things are visible and other are not....each one is different....Loveing everyone for who they are no matter what is God's wish for all of us! We are perfect in his eyes, he created us just the way he wanted us! CELEBRATE perfection and inperfections.
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